The 2008 Paulies, Marisa-style (Or the Misies, if you will)

Hi there—so I was initially going to post an official, Jackson-stamp-of-approval Paulies list, but once I read everyone's insightful musings on the year in music, I knew I couldn't even attempt to out-indie anyone here.  But I can match esotericism for esotericism, and I can write what I know.  And thus with that, I give you my 2008 Paulies, Marisa-style: The Year's Top10 Project Runway Episodes.  (Disclaimer: This will be far more relevant/interesting to the Obsolete Vernacular readers who are also part of the Official Project Runway Viewing Group, Brooklyn Chapter.  To the rest of you, sincerest apologies).

 

10.  "Transformation":  While I remain convinced this episode was just a lazy hodge-podge of Season 4's prom dress episode and Season 3's mom episode (only more boring), I still like the overall idea.  The designers had to take a real recent college graduate and create an office-appropriate new outfit that would help get her a job.  If you're like me, you graduated college with little more than grimy flip flops and a North Face fleece to your name (at my fashion-deprived school, you wore both at the same time), so getting a custom-made work outfit would have been a really exciting prospect.  And, furthermore, Jerell rocks the leaf-beret in this episode!  You all remember the leaf-beret, don't you?

 

9.  "En Garde":  I'm a fan of this episode because there wasn't a lot of the over-produced BS that Runway is somewhat infamous for.  The challenge was simple and straightforward—create an avant-garde garment—and allowed the designers to just demonstrate their talent to create, for better or for worse.  Plus, we were introduced to "Team Fierce": designers Christian Siriano and Chris March are paired up into a Project Runway dream team.  The two end up winning with a latte-colored, multi-tiered, Dior-esque ruffled floor-length gown that may be one of the most impressive designs ever created during the show's entire run. 

 

8. "Bright Lights, Big City":  Ok, so this was basically an exact replica of Season 2's episode that sent Chole, Santino, Andre, et al, out onto the New York City streets armed with cameras to snap pictures of "inspiration" off of which to base a garment.  However, in Season 5's version, the designers rode a double-decker bus!  At night!!!  Ok, so the episode itself was lame, but I'm going to have to give props to anything that showcases my beloved city in all its inspirational glory. 

 

7.  "What's the Skinny?":  This was Season 4's transformation challenge, where the designers were supposed to create a new outfit for real-world ladies who had recently lost a bunch of weight.  While the challenge itself was boring and dowdy (as "real-world ladies" tend to be), this is the episode where fan-favorite pretty-boy Jack has to leave due to the flesh-eating virus attacking his face.  Seriously.  In a tearful goodbye (well, I was crying at least) Jack bids his fellow designers farewell—and who should return to take his place but Chris March, the other fan-favorite who was voted off on the previous episode due to some atrocious shoulder pads!  Granted this second chance, Chris proves he is in it to win it and admirably dukes it out 'til the end, where he makes the fatal mistake of using human hair to fringe a jacket.  (See #3).

 

6.  "What's Your Sign?":  This, in my opinion, is actually one of the worst PRs ever.  But I'm putting it on my list because it is perfect in its exemplification of everything that was done wrong in Season 5—the absolute embodiment of all of the season's shortcomings. First strike: we're halfway through the season, and all the designers who were eliminated in previous challenges due to shoddy work are brought back on.  To compete for a chance to get back into the competition? No! Actually, it's for the sole purpose of using their zodiac sign for creating an outfit.  Yes, the episode's title is literal: the challenge is to make an avant-garde garment based off a zodiac sign.  The fact that this challenge was basically copying the "En Garde" episode in Season 4 (See #9) makes for the second strike.  Third strike: all the outfits completely sucked.  But what did we expect when the pre-design collaborating conversations went something like "Ok, so I'm a Libra, so the outfit should look really balanced.  Maybe she should hold scales!" So, let's go over that again: rehashing old challenges + pointless over-produced "plot" twists + cliché challenge + shitty designers=WORST PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE EVER!

 

5.  "Eye Candy": The Times Square Hershey's Store challenge!  Remember this one? It was pure fun.  The designers are unleashed in the Hershey's Chocolate flagship store in Times Square to grab whatever they can stuff into one bag to use to make an outfit.  I've never been to the TS Hershey's store (God help me), but apparently they sell more than just candy.  True creativity was showcased here as the contestants used candy wrappers, candy bar-shaped pillows, and red licorice (in Jillian's case) to create outfits. 

 

4.  "Good Queen Fun":  This is the over-the-top drag episode in Season 5 which delivered so much of what the rest of the season's challenges were lacking: innovation, creativity, fun, and a touch of the risqué.  Beloved Season 4 contestant and part-time drag queen Chris March returns in this episode (dressed in full Viking-woman regalia, + goatee) to present the challenge: create an outfit for a famous drag queen.  The ladies are all larger than life, and need designs to match.  Hilarity ensues.  The queens are more demanding and outlandish in behavior than any 16-year-old starving Czech model could ever muster up the energy to be—and the best part is when they come in for a fitting wearing their non-drag gear.  As in normal, man clothing.  I had no idea drag queens could look so…um…hetero. This episode also features one of my all-time favorite Tim Gunn quips: "It looks like a pterodactyl from a gay Jurassic Park!"

 

3.  "Finale, Season 4": Christian wins!  The cocky-yet-loveable pint-size designer becomes Project Runway's youngest winner ever at 22.  With a final runway show of sophisticated, urban, and daring designs, Christian wins the ultimate honors at the conclusion of Season 4 with his final Fashion Week show at Bryant Park.  Lots of skinny pants and black.  Lots.  But I love skinny pants and black!  Jillian and Rami put up a good fight though as second and third place, and viewers can be satisfied that they just witnessed the most talented, "fiercest" season of this show (of maybe any reality TV show) yet.  Unfortunately, Chris March does not prove as lucky when he decides there is nothing creepy about incorporating human hair as fringe on his jackets, thus creeping out the judges and cementing his certain elimination from the finale. 

 

2.  "Raw Talent":  This episode was kind of a first for PR.  The show usually attempts to either align itself with serious fashion or real-world "transformation" type-challenges, but this was its first (intentional) foray into bad taste.  The designers are challenged with creating a costume for WWF  female-wrestling "Divas".  So we're talking spandex, glitter, and boobs.  Lots of boobs.  The audacity of PR just to go there warrants the #2 spot on my list—with bonus points given for the fact that the increasingly annoying Ricky (and his hats) get kicked off in this episode.  

 

1.  "The Art of Fashion": The last episode before the season 4 finale, remaining designers Rami, Chris, Christian, and Jillian accompany Tim Gunn to the Metropolitan Museum of Art to get inspiration for their next challenge.  Not only was it a challenge that married the creative aspects of art, history, and fashion, it paid homage to the overall inspiration that lives within New York City and one of its quintessential landmarks.  And the most inspiring part was that they were let in before opening, so the museum was completely deserted.  Not packed in ass-to-elbow with school groups and tourists at the Met? Actually getting to see the art?  How very un-New York.  Christian and Jillian shone on the runway with their impeccably tailored jackets, but unfortunately Rami went all Rami on us and created a Grecian-style wrap dress inspired from the Greek and Roman room.  Which would have been cute if a) It wasn't the most obvious option in the whole museum and b) He hadn't already made the same dress for the last 15 challenges. 

And because there will probably not be a Project Runway in 2009, or if there is it will be on Lifetime and in L.A. and so I wouldn't deign to watch it, I want to officially bid this show my auf wiedersehen!